Vacation and Such

Ahhh, vacation was wonderful. For a week, we literally did nothing. We floated between the pool at the house, the pools in our complex and the beach. We went out to eat a few times and took Eric shopping to a toy store on his birthday, but otherwise, did nothing. No shopping, no site seeing...sweet nothing. And yet, the week flew by. Our weeks usually go by pretty quickly with how busy we are that I thought doing nothing might slow time down a bit. Apparently not.

On the way to the beach we stopped for the night in Tysons Corner, VA. We have never spent a night in a hotel with the boys, but we were excited to do it, knowing we might only get a few hours of sleep. They had so much fun jumping on the beds, taking a bath, etc. While watching the Penguins take the Stanley Cup, Eric fell asleep around 10, Evan around 11. They slept until nearly 7 a.m., which, if you know my boys, is seriously late. The only issue was Benny. The dog rarely, if ever, barks. That isn't the case in a hotel. Every sound or shadow under the door he saw/heard he was barking. At one point, it scared Evan so badly he fell out of bed! Though he never woke up. It wasn't particularly annoying because Rob dealt with the dog and all I heard all night (in a whisper-yell) was "Benny, stop." It was hilarious.

Taking Benny on vacation this year was great. It was so nice having our whole family together. I know, I sound lame, but Benny is still the first baby. He "fell" in the pool one time and that was it for his swimming experience. He swam over to Rob and literally tried to grab onto him. If he was younger, I would have forced it, but I didn't want my eight-year-old dog breaking a hip because I wanted to see him swim. He was on the beach a few times and running through shallow waves, but never really got in. Probably hard since we had him on a leash almost all of the time.

During the week we went down to the beach, flew our kite, played in the sand. Really, it was a wonderful week. The weather wasn't great--only high 70's and fairly overcast most of the time, but warm enough to get in the ocean and the pools. Coming home wasn't too painful and the boys were excellent for the 10-hour car ride that started a 4 a.m.

Now that we are home, life continues to be insane. Rob started his last semester of grad school this week. Three nights a week until mid-august. I know he can't wait for it to be over, but I CAN'T WAIT for him to be done. It's been a long three years and I’m not even the one in school.

The boys had vacation bible school this week at the church where they attend preschool. It only cost $15 per child so, to be totally honest, I wasn't expecting much. I just thought it would buy me some time to catch up on work and errands since we were away for a week (my how those things pile up quickly). To my pleasant surprise, it was AWESOME and the boys LOVED it. It was 2.5 hours every morning for the week. It was fast-moving and set up in 20-30 minute segments of opening ceremonies, crafts, rec time, bible/story time, music, etc. Both of their TSS went with them, which gave me a week of having no one in my house. I really like both of their TSS, but it's nice not having anyone here for a week. Both the TSS seemed impressed with the program and I simply cannot believe how organized it was and how much the boys loved it. It goes through elementary school age so clearly the boys will be going there for years to come!

Next week it is back to our regular schedule :-(. On top of the normal therapies, meetings and general running around, the boys start horseback riding again on Tuesday. I can't wait for that. I think I enjoy it as much as them!

On a totally separate note, I spoke with the boys' nurse practitioner yesterday regarding the blood work we had done a month or so ago. Both boys are doing well. They still have significant immune dysregulation, however, it is slowly beginning to get better. Evan's gluten tolerance has increased and he is now in the normal range, however, we still have to follow the gluten-free diet. It's nice to know that it is getting better, even when we let him cheat! I won't bore you with all of the finer details, but in general, the boys are doing better health-wise...and really in general. A nice, relaxing vacation and some good summer weather does us all some good!

Here are a few photos from vacation and the last few weeks. Enjoy!

The fam down at the beach! My friend Kelley came down for a few days, so she got some of all four (well, five) of us together.

Eric in the pool--where he LOVES to be!

The boys in the water at dusk.

Boys taking a bath in one of the two huge tubs in the house. I failed to mention the house was entirely too large for our family. We rented soundside this year (won't do it again. The location really wasn't too bad, but the smell was less than desirable). We had four bedrooms, only needed three at the most, and the boys decided our first night there that they were going to share a room!

More fam on the beach.

The boys playing Wii.

Rob and Evan flying Evan's Cars kite. They are far bottom left and the kite is far top right.

Evan and I in the "little" pool, a.k.a. the hot tub.

Boys and Daddy going for a walk at the nature preserve.

Eric on the Slip 'N Slide in our backyard.

Evan on the Slip 'N Slide in our backyard.

Evan in the dryer....just don't even ask.

Three Days Away

I just got back yesterday from a three-day girl’s weekend in Richmond with Tiffany and Abby. We had such a nice, relaxing weekend. Ate too much, drank too much and did a whole lot of nothing, but it was well deserved. That’s the longest I have ever been away from the boys by myself. Have to say, I’m quite proud of myself. Though I have to admit I’m sad it’s over, I was very anxious to get home to see ALL my boys. Rob took off on Friday to spend the day with the boys. They went to the zoo, for a cookout at Adam and Nancy’s, up to his sisters, etc.
The boys are doing well. We took them last weekend for their blood work and won’t know for another month or so what the results are. They were both so good and brave and handled it so well. Eric is handling the new vitamins well; Evan not so much. We have pulled him off of all his new supplements and will reintroduce them slowly. Something was making him whiny and cranky and bossy and miserable. It’s kind of frustrating because he is doing so well—better than we could have hoped a year ago—and this just threw him off. But, we’ll figure it out and move forward.

They are both done with school and we should know something about Eric’s new TSS sometime this week or next. He currently has no one as his one who was pregnant has stopped working and the other one, whom we didn’t like, we got rid of once school was done.

We leave for three weeks for vacation. I can’t say I’m anxious for the drive, but after a nice, long, relaxing weekend, I’m ready for the beach.

Not much else going on. Life is slowing down for the summer and it is wonderful!

Happy Mother's Day: Part 2

I know, you don't hear from me for a month and now I'm up to two posts per day.

We had an awesome day today. We went to lunch, the boys rode their bikes at the park, we played at the park, went to the animal shelter and had crab legs for dinner. A GREAT day! The boys know how and actually enjoyed riding their bikes. They never cease to amaze me. Little, everyday miracles, right? What a wonderful Mother's Day gift from my boys--a day of euphoric normalcy--great behavior, fun and lots of laughs! It doesn't get any better.

Anyway, here are some photos and videos from today.

Happy Mother's Day

I wanted to post some new pics of the boys to the site, but just haven't gotten around to it. Well, Rob handled it for me. For Mother's Day, he met a photographer at a local park and had some amazing photos of the boys taken. Not only that, he had her put together a book of the best ones, with quotes about moms, etc. It's really awesome. As Rob said, this is the gift that all future gifts will be judged against. Good luck to him.

Here is the link and the album passcode is: rbilger.

http://www.jesphotographyonline.com/Proof%20Buddy/

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Seriously, don't I have the cutest kids (and sweetest husband) on the planet?

Etc., Etc., Etc.

I am an etc. abuser and I know it, so why not title a blog entry by it? Put it out there, in the open and acknowledge my overuse (and abuse) of it...

I had Eric's IEP meeting last week and, truth be told, I couldn't be happier. His teacher, speech and occupational therapists, the principle, everyone involved is really great--on the ball, on the same page with me as far as addressing both good and bad behaviors, wants to be in contact with all of our service providers so that there is consistency of care and learning, etc. I was really impressed and can't wait for the school year to start. I have high hopes and by now I should know better. But something great is coming for Eric. I know it. I have to believe it.

He will get to ride the bus home from school every day. A smaller bus, and not the same one as the kids in our neighborhood, but that is OK. Sometime this summer we will get to go and visit the school so he can see his classroom, etc. I think he will LOVE it. It's so fit for him--a trampoline, soft lighting, computers. He may think he died and went to heaven. Until they start working the crap out of him in the fall!

We had our appointment today with our "special" doctor. I truly don't know what else to call her. What was supposed to be an hour and a half for each boy turned into 20 minutes for Evan and an hour and a half for Eric--more or less. Evan's just doing phenomenal. He is progressing at an incredible rate. We have our TSS to thank for that. No doubt. He loves her. She is great with him. And she has made all the difference. Plus, Evan was a different (and is a different) case than Eric. I can only imagine his increased amount of time in school next year (three days verses the two he is there now) will help him even more!

Though overall Eric is doing well, where Evan takes leaps and bounds, Eric takes small, baby steps. Which is funny, it's just like their personalities. Evan goes into a room on and ready to run the show and Eric takes his time, observing and taking everything into account. I could learn a few things from my son--slowing down a bit, singing while I'm slowing down, etc.

I digress. The last few months have been trying and we have muddled through and are finally emerging on the other side. That isn't without questions, though. What happened to push Eric so far over the edge? Rob and I suspect allergies, so we are going to make an appointment with an allergist. Since the "special" doctor is doing another blood-panel on each of the boys--a good comparison with last year's baseline--we will wait until we see the allergist as they usually do blood tests in children as young as Eric. I do not want to subject him (or myself) to the hell of blood work. Though both of the boys were troopers last time, it brought me to tears.

If nothing comes back from the allergist, we will have a full food allergy panel done. They are hesitant to have us do this as it is very expensive and insurance doesn't cover it. Seriously, these doctors have Eric and Evan's best interests at heart. They want them to get better, but not bankrupt us.

Not sure what the next steps are beyond that, if they find nothing. In the meantime, both of the boys will start on Vitamin C and D supplements, as well as Calcium and Magnesium. This is just the next step in the process. I'm most anxious to start the Magnesium with both of the boys as it is supposed to have a calming effect and I hope it can give them a bit of reprieve from the hyperactivity and jitteriness they have inherited from me.

More to come, but overall things are well here. May is an insane month between preschool stuff and my work and other things. I'm looking forward to the insanity that will ensue this summer with 27 hours of TSS in our house, not to mention the other activities I'm trying to get the boys in--bible camp, horseback riding, weekly field trips, etc. Gotta do something to keep ourselves busy :-)

AWESOME Weekend!

After posting such a negative update last time, we had an amazing weekend with the boys. We were outside most of the weekend--working in the yard, getting ice cream, going to the parks (yes, not once, but twice--in one day! Thanks, Rob.). We are thinking that Eric has allergies. He has been miserable the last two months and recently started coughing, getting really hoarse, etc. I started giving him Claritin on Friday night and maybe that has made all the difference. I assumed it was being outside all weekend--fresh air, bare feet and lots of sun--what every little boy needs. But maybe he is just feeling better--you know, "Claritin clear."

We have the "special" doctor's appointment on May 7. I'm fairly certain they will order more blood work to see where the boys are in comparison to last year. I'm hoping they can do some allergy testing on Eric as well. Poor boy got all the crap in life--aside from the obvious--lazy eye, webbed toe, glasses, nappy hair...I could go on and on. He's cute as hell though, so....

We have Eric's IEP meeting on Thursday (also happens to be Benny's eighth birthday--he's getting so old :-(). I'm anxious to meet his teacher. I saw her when I went to visit the classroom and have spoken with her on the phone, but I'm still excited to sit down and chat with her. I met his speech therapist that he will have next year and she is amazing. Had some really great ideas for Eric--after only meeting him for a few minutes! Things no one had thought of before. She also holds a lot of the same beliefs as me, i.e., if he is using his words, he should be rewarded, etc.

Saturday, Rob and I are headed to PSU for the night. A night away for our seventh anniversary. Yep, seven years. It has flown by!

I will hopefully post more after this week to let you know how the IEP meeting went.

The Pain of Parenting

I had a meeting two weeks ago with the school psychologist regarding all of the testing that Eric has done for entrance into Kindergarten. We went over all of the results and, like all evaluation-type meetings, it was nearly two hours of the things that are wrong with my child.

At the end of the meeting, I asked what their recommendation would be for next school year--our home school or the elementary school that is farther away that has the autism classroom. They recommended the autism classroom. And I started to cry. Not because I felt like they were ganging up on me or that they were trying to put Eric somewhere he doesn't belong, but because the truth hurts and he does belong there. I want to believe that Eric is perfect. That I will wake up one day and this will all have gone away, the truth is this is my life. Our life.

After discussing why this is what they recommended--he needs more one-to-one support, the learning support classroom in our home school is quite the revolving door and has A LOT going on at any given point during the day and Eric would get lost, that in the autism classroom he would still have the opportunity to interact with regular peers because the district is big on inclusion (plus, it's the law), etc. They made valid point after valid point and I simply could not argue. When it's just one person and Eric he is usually on--looking at you, answering questions, sharing the knowledge that he has, interacting and being playful. When you add more than that (unless it's just the four of us in our immediate family), Eric gets lost. He sucks on his finger and does his own thing. It's hard to interact with him. It's hard for him to focus. This classroom would give him the environment that he needs. Not to mention that the teacher strongly believes in applied behavior analysis (what we do all the time), but because she has over 20 years of experience with kids on the spectrum.

When Rob and I finally sat down to discuss everything that night, we were both beaten and shaken by it. Little by little these kinds of things chip away at the dream we have for Eric. Rob made the most valid point. The last two years Eric has been in a typical preschool with a TSS. Last year he had an awesome TSS and a horrible teacher. This year he has a great teacher and a terrible TSS. What we have been doing simply isn't working and now is the time to take another avenue.

Long story short, and after running away to Baltimore for a few days just to get away from here, I called the school psychologist and told her that we were choosing the autism classroom and that we could go ahead and schedule the IEP meeting--no need to meet with both principals and teachers to further discuss his placement.

After all the anguish over all of this, I am finally feel a small sense of relief. It's the not-knowing that always drives me insane.