I've been reading this blog regularly. Am I wrong for being OK with who my kids are? I want them to be happy, feel better, do better and become something, but I'm not willing to sacrifice what makes them who they are, and if that is autism, so be it. Eric is the sweetest, cutest, melt-your-heart and make-you-want-to-cry-from-amazement most astounding person I have ever been privileged to meet, let alone be a parent to. And if autism makes Evan the feisty, numbers-oriented, always-on-the-go, keep-me-guessing, fun-seeking boy that he is, so be it. I don't want them to suffer or feel sick, but I believe that where we are, what we are going through is for a reason. Every decision, every choice I have made in my life has put me here for some reason greater than my own selfish fulfillment.
Do you ever experience déjà vu? I do...a lot. They say that that is the universe telling you that you are right where you are supposed to be. Is that bullshit? I don't know. Is it like telling a bride that rain on her wedding day is good luck so that she isn't so overwhelmed by bad weather that she misses one of the most amazing and memorable days in her life? To me, good, bad or indifferent, every moment, every instance, even every roadblock is a memory, a story in the making.
Maybe I'm looking for a reason not to fight harder or push more, but I think I need to find a balance between helping my children become whatever it is that they will be, and living a life that we can all be happy with.
http://www.chicagonow.com/blogs/fighting-autism-and-winning/
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